Posts Tagged ‘King David’

I have heard many men and women complain about how hard it is to find a good spouse. Many of these people become impatient and settle for someone less than ideal for them, while others are so overly cautious, that they miss the very one that God has chosen for them. (Myself included)

What many people don’t realize is that the Bible gives us much wisdom—Not just on spiritual decisions, but on common sense decisions as well.

To know if a woman should be involved with a man, refer to 1 Timothy 3:1-13 where the apostle Paul writes about the qualifications of bishops and deacons in the Church.

So look for someone who is:

  • Sensible
  • Hospitable,
  • An apt teacher,
  • Not a drunkard,
  • Not violent or quarrelsome
  • Not a lover of money
  • Not conceited
  • Well thought of by others
  • Not double-tongued
  • Not addicted to drugs or alcohol
  • Faithful to God with a clear conscience

Now, no man is going to be perfect, but if he adheres to these character traits most of the time, then you know he is safe to be with. (And remember it also says to let them be tested!)

Men are also given advice about the women they should seek out in verse 11:

  • They must be respected
  • They must not slander others
  • They must exercise self-control
  • Be faithful in everything they do

You probably notice that there are more qualifications for men than for women. That’s because men are to be the leader. Therefore, more responsibility rests on him.

Many men have obsessed over finding a “Proverbs 31 Woman” as a wife. This hypothetical woman in Proverbs 31 is skillful in a lot of different things—And she’s skillful in all of them. News flash guys: SHE DOES NOT EXIST!

According to the chapter, she wakes up super early, has great biceps, buys property, is always dressed elegantly, keeps her home warm at night and keeps herself looking great all the time, and still has time to care for the poor!

Many women would read this passage and think, “Sheesh! How am I supposed to try and fit into this mold?”

What if she can’t sew or cook? What if she’s not a great housekeeper? Does that mean she’s not living up to her God-given potential as a female? Of course not!

Many Bible scholars believe that the “Proverbs 31 Woman” is not really a woman at all, but rather a personification of wisdom. If you read the whole book of Proverbs, you’ll realize that wisdom is consistently referred to as “she.” In the final chapter, I believe that the analogy of a woman here is used to depict a tangible example of wisdom in action.

Notice that the only instruction in the chapter that is given to men concerning a woman is in the last verse: “Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.”

In Jewish culture, men memorize this chapter as a song of praise to the women in their lives. But in Western culture, it is instead often used as a shopping list to be fulfilled in a future wife.

There’s a common Acronym that is written, K.I.S.S. (Keep It Simple Stupid) Men should focus more Proverbs 31 verses 1 through 10.

It first warns of the dangers of wasting time on loose women and drunkenness, encourages us to ensure justice for the poor and downtrodden. And then verse 10 tells us, “Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies.”

So get rid of your “Wife Qualification List” and focus more on how you can better be qualified as a husband.

My Final thoughts

I don’t think God is as concerned about WHO we marry as much as he is concerned about how we treat the one we’re married to.

Wives, your primary goal is to help make your husband the very best he can be. Not by nagging or being demanding, but by trusting God to direct his steps. If your husband is a godly man who prays and listens to God, then all you have to do is pray and trust God. And even if you are married to an unbeliever, your goal is the same. Because your unbelieving husband might be saved because of you. (1 Corinthians 7:16)

Husbands, your primary goal is to help make your wife the very best she can be. Not by lording over her and demanding that she submit to your every whim, but by praising her for all the good she does for you and supporting her in all she does.

And most importantly, pray for each other.

To those who are still waiting for God to choose that special person for you, remember that Psalms 27:14 teaches us to, “Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart.”

Living in our “fast food society” we can sometimes feel that God has let us down because He does not provide an immediate answer to a prayer. But waiting for the Lord can transform us into a people of growing faith.

King David spent many years waiting to be crowned king and fleeing from Saul’s wrath. It was probably during that time that David wrote those encouraging words in Psalms 27.

So just keep waiting on the Lord and he SHALL strengthen your heart. Delight yourself in Him and He WILL give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37)

According to many mental health experts, anxiety and depression are both considered mood disorders that many people struggle with today. According to Anxiety and Depression Association of America, anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older. That’s close to 18% of U.S. population!

Mental health experts have prescribed everything from avoiding caffeine and alcohol, to getting more sleep and exercise, to prescription drugs—with little or no results. Many doctors suggest that antidepressants are not addictive because they don’t give you a buzz that you chase after like alcohol or cocaine. However, most pharmacists consider any antidepressant a controlled substance that requires a doctor’s written request every time a person refills their prescription. And if you discontinue an antidepressant abruptly you can experience withdrawal symptoms. (Sounds addictive to me)

Do you often deal with anxiety? Are you consumed with worry? Even well-meaning Christians will suggest that you can learn to manage these emotions by simply meditating on Scripture, pray, and focus on Jesus. All of these things can be helpful in overcoming depression and anxiety, but I don’t believe that it’s that simple.

Depression is something that has been around for thousands of years. Before I went through my own valley of suffering and depression, I would read the Psalms. I can’t tell you how thankful I was that God recorded King David’s struggle with depression in His Word. Because now I could identify with his suffering—I cried out those same cries and felt those same pains of despair. It somehow brought me comfort just to know that I was not the only one who ever experienced depression like this.

There may be some underlying mental disorders that can contribute and even exacerbate depression and anxiety, but I believe that the key to overcoming depression and anxiety that most people suffer with is forgiveness.

We all know how bad it feels to have someone judge us harshly, and refuse to forgive. It’s unfair, and it makes us feel sad, angry, and depressed. One of the sad facts of life is that we all make mistakes. We all hurt people. We all sin. None of us are perfect, so to expect perfection of yourself or others is an exercise in futility.

There are so many people who are carrying around the baggage of unforgiveness. Without forgiving others, the pain that they inflicted on you never leaves. It can’t heal because you won’t let it heal. The people who hurt you aren’t being hurt if you hold onto the pain, and refuse to forgive them. That only hurts you. A wise man once said, “Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”

But what do you do when the person who hurt you is yourself? You must forgive yourself too. Sometimes we judge ourselves more harshly than anyone else does. It’s sometimes more difficult to accept our own imperfections. But in order to forgive ourselves, we have to accept them. Think of the pain you feel when you’ve hurt someone else, and that person refuses to forgive you. Well, believe it or not, it hurts even more when you don’t forgive yourself. The pain is there, but until you realize that it is self-inflicted, you can’t let it go. Regrets and unforgiveness create pain, anxiety and depression, but you don’t have to allow it.

King David was “a man after God’s own heart” (Acts 13:22) and Israel’s most illustrious king—a giant killer, and yet, here was a man given to depression in the midst of his suffering:

“My heart is blighted and withered like grass; I forget to eat my food. Because of my loud groaning I am reduced to skin and bones. I am like a desert owl, like an owl among the ruins.
I lie awake; I have become like a bird alone on a roof.”
(Psalm 102:4-7 NLT)

But David later acknowledged his sin to God and was forgiven—and in turn forgave others. (And himself) Just as I lamented about my depression before God, I am thankful that I could also join in singing out the same praises as King David did:

“I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God.” (Psalm 40:1-3 NLT)

If you are one of the many people who has been beating yourself up for things you’ve done in the past, or something someone has done to you, it’s time to stop it right now and forgive! Even if it’s not possible to forgive someone because of death or inaccessibility to the offender, speak the acknowledgement anyway—and mean it. Repeat it as many times as you feel necessary. Over time, the unforgiveness, as well as the depression related to it, will ease, and eventually, your heart and mood will become much lighter.

The most important step in forgiving is to simply to make the decision to do it. You don’t have to “feel” it yet. That will come with time. You don’t have to wait for the person you hurt to forgive you either. In fact, they might not ever forgive you. But if they choose to hold onto that pain after you’ve tried to make it right, you are not responsible for their unforgiveness. You are only responsible to ask for you. Just remember that forgiving doesn’t mean that you have to have Thanksgiving dinner with the one who hurt you. Nor does it mean that you allow yourself to be abused, or that you must continue to subject yourself to the hurtful actions of others. You must forgive, but a continued relationship with the person who hurt you is completely up to you.

When our nation’s Founders designed their plan for a more perfect union, they understood that the success of a modern republic would require more than a political document like the Constitution. Because of their study of history and knowledge of human nature, the Founders knew the pitfalls that plagued civilizations before this one. They knew that the Constitution alone could not curb individual selfishness. They believed that virtues were necessary for sustaining the American experiment.

But who really decides who will become the leader of America?

Read Dan. 2:1-49:

“He controls the course of world events; he removes kings and sets up other kings. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the scholars. He reveals deep and mysterious things and knows what lies hidden in darkness, though he is surrounded by light.” (v.21-22)

“Your Majesty, you are the greatest of kings. The God of heaven has given you sovereignty, power, strength, and honor.” (v.37)

Read Daniel 4:4-37:

“You will be driven from human society, and you will live in the fields with the wild animals. You will eat grass like a cow, and you will be drenched with the dew of heaven. Seven periods of time will pass while you live this way, until you learn that the Most High rules over the kingdoms of the world and gives them to anyone he chooses.” (v.25)

Does that mean that whoever wins the presidential election is appointed by God? I would say, yes.  I don’t believe there is any leader that God hasn’t appointed- Even evil leaders.

“For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God.” (Romans 13:1)

In Israel the people wanted a King, (1 Samuel 8:1-22) which was not what God wanted, but because of the hardness of their heart God appointed King Saul, who ended up being evil. As I have stated before, today we have high rates of divorce, babies born out of wedlock, youth violence, and so on.

Just as Israel of old, we too, have forgotten God and replaced him with our own golden calf. We have bowed down to the idols of humanism, secularism, and government control, and we have reaped the rewards of our actions.

This year’s presidential election may be one of the most important in recent history. Many are concerned that the outcome will result in another overreaching administration that violates our constitutional rights. But what most of them don’t realize is that a leader is merely a reflection of the people they lead.

It’s possible that God will appoint another King Saul for us in order to bring us to repentance. The only way to attain true freedom is to seek God’s mercy with a repentant heart and pray that He will appoint the leader we need, and not the leader we want.

“Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.” (2Chron. 7:14)

Scripture shows us how the Israelites loved David. But the more they loved David, the more Saul hated him. Jealousy filled Saul’s heart and controlled him so much that all he could think of was how to get rid of David. Saul and his soldiers hunted David and his men in the wilderness for eight long years. Saul did everything in his power to catch David and kill him. However, one day, while in a battle with the Philistines, Saul and his three sons died. Thus, the descendants of Saul were completely exterminated, just as God had said they would be. In the chapters that follow, the Scriptures relate how God finally turned the kingdom of Israel over to David. (1 Samuel 17 – 2 Samuel 7)

We can be certain that whoever is elected, God has appointed them. But we should still always oppose anything they do that is immoral or unethical. God Himself will judge concerning such things.

I believe as a follower of Messiah, it is our responsibility to stand in the gap for our fellow Americans. And doing so will help ensure a new birth of freedom – A freedom that comes from following God and not man. 

The power of prayer should not be underestimated. James 5:16 declares, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”

James goes on to explain that, “Elijah was a man just like us. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops.”   (v. 17-18)

I pray that as God’s people we will humble ourselves and pray and seek God’s face and turn from our wicked ways so that God will forgive our sins and then we will hear from heaven and God will restore our land. (2Chron. 7:14)